Both my friends who watched venom with me said they wouldn’t want a symbiote and I’m like bitch are you thick???? You’re immortal and have a buddy who knows everything ya want n is always there for u and loves and cares for ya and you can eat whatever you want and if ya gotta eat som ppl every now n then so WHAT?! sign me tf up i already have a list of folks who could use some getting eaten. cowards.
i just cant get over the lobster scene. like his friends are actively begging him, do not get into the lobster tank. please eddie. tom hardy you were in mad max fury road dont do this. and tom hardy looks at his friend like “i know i shouldnt do this. i shouldnt be getting into this lobster tank but i’m going to anyway. i’m already mostly inside. cant stop now. i’m sorry i dont want to be doing this either there’s just no other choice for me.” and then he takes a bg bite out of a live lobster that’s still in the shell and everything.
tom hardy doesn’t actually know he’s being possessed by an alien yet in the story. he’s just resigned himself to whatever fucking meltdown he seems to be having. he doesn’t even seem particularly surprised that things have gone this way for him. like ten minutes later he finds out his heart stopped working and hes just like “you asshole” and he throws his alien parasite against the wall like a water balloon. and then he just leaves and is immediately kidnapped. what a fucking wild ride tom hardy is on.
tom hardy’s actual superpower is being the exact same level of dysfunctional no matter what is happening in his life. so when everything’s going ok for him he self-destructs spectacularly, but when literally everything that can happen to a human being happens to him, he does, like, unrealistically well. climbing into a lobster tank and eating a live animal with large claws just like… “well, this is what’s happening to me today. i’m so sorry you have to watch this, man. anyway here goes, i’m going to bite into a living creature with my human mouth and then LOSE CONSCIOUSNESS”
this movie’s fucking killing me from the inside.
IT WASNT EVEN IN THE SCRIPT TOM HARDY IS JUST A FUCKING GENUINE MADMAN
honestly if you wouldn’t bond with a symbiote you’re a fucking idiot, like you get unbelievably powerful and sexy and all you have to do is what? not go in fire or listen to noises that sound bad? newsflash idiot i already dont go in fire or listen to noises that sound bad. dumbass. you gotta eat some living flesh once in a while? whatever dude easy shit
you dont even need to do that its canon that the symbiotes just need one chemical from people and its also found in chocolate so you get to be huge and sexy and eat a bunch of chocolate
cguard 